Post by "The Freq" on Oct 19, 2009 11:32:29 GMT -5
Why is it that people always expect something of you even when they have no clue about you personally or in general? I'm not talking about what someone expects of me at work. I'm talking about people who expect my life to be a certain way when it is not their life to change or direct. I've also had the interesting experience of being hated and or respected by people who for some reason, feel that when I voice my opinion, it should have boundaries that suit them, not me. I have to be clear on something first and foremost. I wasn't put on this planet to impress people, nor was I put on this planet to be molded into something else by others. In my opinion, which seems to piss people off, I was given a simple life to build on by learning, exploring, testing, advancing, communicating, etc. No two people are alike. We all have a journey, whether it be short or long and we all have some type of purpose no matter what state of health or mind you are in. The truth of it is, most of us, myself included do not really have an ultimate perfect goal planned out for our life. It's something you feel out through each day of living because in reality, anything can happen in a minutes time. What's important to me or us, is the journey and what we learn along the way. We hope that if we gather enough knowledge, we will find a clearer path to a destiny. Yeah, that may sound kinda nutty to some but if you break it down, we all take a journey after we're born and your experiences and the people you meet paint the picture of where you've been, and where you might be going. Truthfully, does anyone really know your future?
My journey was to be a musician. My rough goal in life was to become either a pro drummer in a pro band and hopefully make it to the big times OR, a session musician that records music for myself and others. That's been my dream since highschool. When I first started drums, I just wanted to play to records at home and have fun with it but then I heard the Who song "My Generation" and after hearing their drummer Keith Moon, I knew I was hooked on becoming a better drummer. When you're young and a musician, it's all about having fun but then there comes a time you either give it up to do other things OR you try to become better or become pro. At that point in time you really have no experience in what the world calls "criticism". This word can do good or bad to a starting musician. It's up to the individual to understand what it means. Most people I know, can't take criticism. SORRY, that's not my fault. For me, I learned early on that I was going to use it as a tool to get better at my craft, which was simply to become a Pro Musician. My first experience of being criticized was by a drummer who I knew and still respect to this day. His name is Angelo F. I was in a band doing my first ever outdoor live show in my very early years of drumming. I still have the show on cassette tape. We did a Rush song called "Limelight" and after our set, I went to say hi to him. We talked a bit and he enjoyed the show but he said, "some people shouldn't be doing RUSH". |O|. Now, you can take that 2 or more ways. He was right in the sense that my band wasn't at the caliber to play Rush correctly nor did we truly understand RUSH,s music technically. However, I took his criticism.. the RIGHT way. He had played longer than me, was more advanced and I valued his opinion as I still do. I took his opinion, evaluated it and turned it into the kick in the ass I needed to focus on becoming better and more aware of what I was doing on the drums. I didn't cry, whine or b*tch that this Angelo was an ass, or an opinionated idiot or worse. He's none of those.. He's a great guy with his own opinion and I ACCEPTED it. I took it as a guy with more talent, hinting for me and my band to work at being better. It's that simple. There was no drama, no backstabbing and most of all, I understood what he was getting at. He probably doesn't even remember that day, but I do and it pointed me in the right direction. Now, the point is that I was being criticized and it didn't bother me in the least. Unfortunately, there are some, especially in this city of Sault Ste. Marie, that think criticism is given by pricks and egomaniacs and that it's not fair to be on the receiving end of ANY criticism. WRONG! There has to be criticism or there is no growth. GET IT? How do you improve if you think you're perfect or the best? Unfortunately there are all kinds of criticism and it's up to the individual to analyze what is what and what benefits ones self. If you block all criticism out without analyzing it or at least attempting to better yourself by it in some way, then you're only depriving yourself of advancement and basically, you're lying to yourself at how good you are. From that moment with Angelo, I've taken every criticism towards me, analyzed it and tried to apply it to a positive advancement technique for my drumming and life in general.. I didn't give up, nor did I b*tch and complain and do nothing to fix the problem. I got off my ass and began to work really hard at becoming a better player. I wasn't out to impress anyone. I do have a brain and I do know what I want to achieve on drums. I'm not even close to my goals but I understand what I need to do. I am not one to say... HEY, that's as far as I'm going.. I'm GREAT, I don't need to learn anymore. That's an egomaniac or a dumb idiot. Not once have I said I'm GREAT. I've been called an egomaniac but sorry, I'm not ready to stop learning yet and I don't think I'm anywhere near the talents of my peers. Is this ego??? I am the first to say I have a long way to go on drums along with the development of my life. I continue to learn. Some confuse my being proud of past or present projects or my opinions, as ego. Then I say to you, "do you just forget your past and not pass it down to anyone like it never happened, basically leaving your legacy to no one whether it be your kids, family, friends or history in general"? Do you want to live your life leaving nothing behind to even show you walked this earth? I just can't accept that for my own life. Is that ego? I want to achieve something with my life. I want people to know that I exist or existed after I'm gone and whether you think I exist in a good or a bad tense , is totally your opinion.
Now, it's one thing to take criticism and it's another to give it. You aren't born with this criticism bug in you and that goes for opinions. It develops over time and it grows as you learn things. It's up to you to use it or abuse it. Now, my first experience of criticizing someone else was watching a local band at an all ages show.
I criticized them to myself. Picking up what I liked and disliked about the drummer's playing mainly, but also his band. I was seeing what I liked in the drummers playing but also what I didn't like. I was learning what I should be doing and at the same time, not be doing. I still follow that method to this day. I also do the same thing with my own playing. I record myself on a regular basis and pick my playing apart, learning from both good and bad performances. As I developed my playing skills, I got into more and more bands. I had dreams of being in certain types of bands and it got to a point, I wanted to create my own band and develop it into something really good. Is that wrong? Is that ego? Of course not. Some in this city will give you some B.S. that it is but it's just a natural step upwards. I was learning drums so why not learn the workings of a band and create one of my own. It was a logical progression. Again, some think it's ego and wanting full control, but it's simply wanting to create and learn more about music. After creating my own bands, I learned about sound systems, bought my own P.A. and started doing my own sound. Then I got into recording. Is any of this ego? No. It's learning as much as you can about something you love. I've done this for decades now and it works. My hope is that I will continue to find projects to be part of. So far, nothing has slowed me down. ;-)
Now there are some that read my "Freq's Music Planet" forum and take what I say and for a lack of a better term "Make a Mountain out of a Mole Hill" just out of spite. Then there are some that will trash me to bits saying I have an ego and that people who use to respect me have lost respect for me from what I say either on my forum or in general. My response to that is quite simple. "I don't care"!!! The reason I write on forums is to express my thoughts. I don't know most of the people who read my rants and honestly, I don't really need to. If they are interested in what I'm saying that's great. They'll have their own opinions and that's great too. My beef is that some of the readers think what I'm doing is over the top. That's their opinion though. I like to think of myself as a Rush Limbaugh, Howard Stern-ish goof that just likes typing and speaking my mind. No, I'm no where near their talent or intelligence but I do like their approach to media. You don't have to read my forum or blog. I'm certainly not forcing you. Now by chance if I talk bad about you on my forums, rarely will I use your name but there is always a reason on why I talk about someone good or bad. It appears lately a tired old local rock band gets offended with what I say. Apparently a handful of others do too. The solution is simple. Don't read my stuff. |O| It's that cut and dry. Some say I shouldn't post what I say online. Why? It's not any different than talking to your friends about a topic. Is it because I'm negative sometimes? I have a right to talk about my experiences when it's on my own website forum. We all talk about the good and bad in our everyday conversations. I see no difference except that typing it online, is constant where as talking about it verbally can change as the story is told to others. Some call it "embellishment". Now, I've heard that people have lost respect for me.. Ummmmm why? I've always been like this. I've always spent time typing or writing. I write all the time for enjoyment. So what respect are you talking about? Is it respect as a musician? Then why should my writings affect that. Make sense? My drumming isn't affected by my writing. Is it respect as a person? Strange, the people that were in my life are still in my life before and after I write and I've been writing on forums for over a decade. All the people close to me are still there so I really don't see a problem. Apparently, from what I understand is that there are some distant people who don't know me very well either as a musician or a person that are losing respect for me. That is very odd don't you think? Should I lose sleep over it? I can't.. because it honestly doesn't bother me. If these people have names, then speak up but if you don't have a tongue, then complaining about me is pointless. When you have respect or lose respect for someone, that's an individuals right. I can't change how someone feels about me when the fact is, my life is what it is. I've always been open with my thoughts, verbal, opinionated but also dedicated, focused and honest. So if respect is lost for me, the problem lies elsewhere because I have in fact, not changed.. Sorry to disappoint you all.. ;-)
Then you have people that hate me. Again.. so what. I won't lose sleep over it. Everyone in the world has someone that dislikes them for some reason, but we're talking hate. I've seen my name mentioned on a few forums in both good and bad
context but there have been a few that want to cause harm. Hmmmm. Now folks, is my written word influencing that kind of attitude or are the individuals who want to cause harm to me the problem. The retarded thing about all of that is that, I don't know these people. "FREE SPEECH" is what my right is. Threatening someone is not a freedom. It's a crime. The bottom line is that I am who I am. It's up to you to make your own choices to accept who I am just like I do with others. If I choose to dislike, for example, a local band for their lack of talent, fat ego attitudes or their quest for being superior beings, that is my prerogative. The truth is, I like, love and respect many individuals that have come in contact with me over the years. They may not be on your list. So be it. I also don't like certain people and you may disagree with my choices but it all comes down to the personal experiences you've had with these people and how they function with you. Going back to my earlier statements, this is was makes our lives unique. We take this journey through life and we all meet people. We even meet the same people in some cases but our experiences won't be exactly the same with these people. Make sense? If I spout off about someone or a band, it's drawn from the experience I've had with them. You may have an experience with them that's good where as mine may have been bad. If you're a dickhead band that caused some crap with me, theirs a good chance I won't say much good about you. Is it my fault? No. Actions cause a reaction. Simple physics really. |O| So any outsider that takes sides, has to understand the circumstances and not just one side of the story. Most dummies take one side and never give the second side a chance to voice their opinions. Hmmmmm sounds like the problem with fans of this local band. They like the band, I don't and they get sour because I'm verbal about it. tsk tsk. It's pointless to explain the other side in cases like this because their minds are made up so, my writings will continue to strike a nerve with them because they just can't believe me. They don't even try. |O| The written word has power though and it seems to strike nerves sometimes.. ;-)
I grow a bit tired of people trying to knock me off the pedestal of what I like to call "My Life". It just won't work with me but some seem to enjoy the challenge. There is no way I want to go through life saying that everything is good, everything is happy, all people are wonderful, all music is great.. blah blah blah. It's just not the truth. Certain musicians in this city want to be sugar coated with compliments and have their egos stroked. It's laughable. I would rather the truth but these dopes want to be lied to. I just can't stoop to lying and giving people false hope. It's just not my way. If you want my opinion, you will get the truth.
So I'm happy to say that I will say what I want, like what I want, love who I want, criticize who I want and you'll have to accept it or just don't bother with me and block me out. Do what makes you happy ;-) That's what I do. That's what most people do and the bottom line is, never read my posts again. If you follow my rants and they piss you off... then remember, no one forced you ya dummy|O|. There's a million and one things you could be doing. I'm not forcing anyone to read my stuff. If you want to read my writings and then cry and complain about it to others like you've been thoroughly belittled and wronged, that's your own fault, not mine. You did something to irk me so basically, stop being a dickhead who "starts" shit. |O| Bottom line, if you're an instigator don't read my stuff because I have a right to respond. If you don't want a response, avoid my forum |O|. What you don't know won't hurt you I believe is the old saying.
Now, in closing I want to say that I still get offers to play in bands despite what some Glen haters think. I play in 2 now and I still get offers to play in other bands. I've recorded 3 albums this year alone and presently working on a 4th with my own band. I have a solid marriage of nearly 30 years. I have lots of friends, some going back to my elementary school days. I have a great dog. I have a life of music, graphic art design and mechanics. I own my own house and I have lots of toys. I enjoy learning as much as I can about music and I want to achieve more before I'm placed in a pine box. I constantly study music to better myself. Outside of this circle of life, are people that just don't know me and probably never will. In turn, they make shit up. It doesn't affect the inner circle I have but they like to think it does. I don't get how some people can think that because I have a loud voice, it will affect my life in a negative way all the time when in fact It truly broadens it. Why can't the few naysayers grasp that little fact. Maybe the respect I've lost from certain people really wasn't there for the right reasons? Maybe it just wasn't true respect. Either way, the most important people and things in my life are ironically still there so to the ones on the outside looking in..... You've been mislead and missed the point of my rants. My life has never been better, music career has never been better and my happiness has never been higher and the icing on the cake... my forum, blogs and other websites have never been more popular |O|
I'll just never understand why certain people are intrigued by my jibberish to the extent that it pisses them off to the point they have to go around lying about me or what I do or write. You really need a hobby. Try typing like me.. haha
I LOVE typing and writing.. ;-).. oh and one more thing. Try talking and living the truth for a change.
glen "the freq".
My journey was to be a musician. My rough goal in life was to become either a pro drummer in a pro band and hopefully make it to the big times OR, a session musician that records music for myself and others. That's been my dream since highschool. When I first started drums, I just wanted to play to records at home and have fun with it but then I heard the Who song "My Generation" and after hearing their drummer Keith Moon, I knew I was hooked on becoming a better drummer. When you're young and a musician, it's all about having fun but then there comes a time you either give it up to do other things OR you try to become better or become pro. At that point in time you really have no experience in what the world calls "criticism". This word can do good or bad to a starting musician. It's up to the individual to understand what it means. Most people I know, can't take criticism. SORRY, that's not my fault. For me, I learned early on that I was going to use it as a tool to get better at my craft, which was simply to become a Pro Musician. My first experience of being criticized was by a drummer who I knew and still respect to this day. His name is Angelo F. I was in a band doing my first ever outdoor live show in my very early years of drumming. I still have the show on cassette tape. We did a Rush song called "Limelight" and after our set, I went to say hi to him. We talked a bit and he enjoyed the show but he said, "some people shouldn't be doing RUSH". |O|. Now, you can take that 2 or more ways. He was right in the sense that my band wasn't at the caliber to play Rush correctly nor did we truly understand RUSH,s music technically. However, I took his criticism.. the RIGHT way. He had played longer than me, was more advanced and I valued his opinion as I still do. I took his opinion, evaluated it and turned it into the kick in the ass I needed to focus on becoming better and more aware of what I was doing on the drums. I didn't cry, whine or b*tch that this Angelo was an ass, or an opinionated idiot or worse. He's none of those.. He's a great guy with his own opinion and I ACCEPTED it. I took it as a guy with more talent, hinting for me and my band to work at being better. It's that simple. There was no drama, no backstabbing and most of all, I understood what he was getting at. He probably doesn't even remember that day, but I do and it pointed me in the right direction. Now, the point is that I was being criticized and it didn't bother me in the least. Unfortunately, there are some, especially in this city of Sault Ste. Marie, that think criticism is given by pricks and egomaniacs and that it's not fair to be on the receiving end of ANY criticism. WRONG! There has to be criticism or there is no growth. GET IT? How do you improve if you think you're perfect or the best? Unfortunately there are all kinds of criticism and it's up to the individual to analyze what is what and what benefits ones self. If you block all criticism out without analyzing it or at least attempting to better yourself by it in some way, then you're only depriving yourself of advancement and basically, you're lying to yourself at how good you are. From that moment with Angelo, I've taken every criticism towards me, analyzed it and tried to apply it to a positive advancement technique for my drumming and life in general.. I didn't give up, nor did I b*tch and complain and do nothing to fix the problem. I got off my ass and began to work really hard at becoming a better player. I wasn't out to impress anyone. I do have a brain and I do know what I want to achieve on drums. I'm not even close to my goals but I understand what I need to do. I am not one to say... HEY, that's as far as I'm going.. I'm GREAT, I don't need to learn anymore. That's an egomaniac or a dumb idiot. Not once have I said I'm GREAT. I've been called an egomaniac but sorry, I'm not ready to stop learning yet and I don't think I'm anywhere near the talents of my peers. Is this ego??? I am the first to say I have a long way to go on drums along with the development of my life. I continue to learn. Some confuse my being proud of past or present projects or my opinions, as ego. Then I say to you, "do you just forget your past and not pass it down to anyone like it never happened, basically leaving your legacy to no one whether it be your kids, family, friends or history in general"? Do you want to live your life leaving nothing behind to even show you walked this earth? I just can't accept that for my own life. Is that ego? I want to achieve something with my life. I want people to know that I exist or existed after I'm gone and whether you think I exist in a good or a bad tense , is totally your opinion.
Now, it's one thing to take criticism and it's another to give it. You aren't born with this criticism bug in you and that goes for opinions. It develops over time and it grows as you learn things. It's up to you to use it or abuse it. Now, my first experience of criticizing someone else was watching a local band at an all ages show.
I criticized them to myself. Picking up what I liked and disliked about the drummer's playing mainly, but also his band. I was seeing what I liked in the drummers playing but also what I didn't like. I was learning what I should be doing and at the same time, not be doing. I still follow that method to this day. I also do the same thing with my own playing. I record myself on a regular basis and pick my playing apart, learning from both good and bad performances. As I developed my playing skills, I got into more and more bands. I had dreams of being in certain types of bands and it got to a point, I wanted to create my own band and develop it into something really good. Is that wrong? Is that ego? Of course not. Some in this city will give you some B.S. that it is but it's just a natural step upwards. I was learning drums so why not learn the workings of a band and create one of my own. It was a logical progression. Again, some think it's ego and wanting full control, but it's simply wanting to create and learn more about music. After creating my own bands, I learned about sound systems, bought my own P.A. and started doing my own sound. Then I got into recording. Is any of this ego? No. It's learning as much as you can about something you love. I've done this for decades now and it works. My hope is that I will continue to find projects to be part of. So far, nothing has slowed me down. ;-)
Now there are some that read my "Freq's Music Planet" forum and take what I say and for a lack of a better term "Make a Mountain out of a Mole Hill" just out of spite. Then there are some that will trash me to bits saying I have an ego and that people who use to respect me have lost respect for me from what I say either on my forum or in general. My response to that is quite simple. "I don't care"!!! The reason I write on forums is to express my thoughts. I don't know most of the people who read my rants and honestly, I don't really need to. If they are interested in what I'm saying that's great. They'll have their own opinions and that's great too. My beef is that some of the readers think what I'm doing is over the top. That's their opinion though. I like to think of myself as a Rush Limbaugh, Howard Stern-ish goof that just likes typing and speaking my mind. No, I'm no where near their talent or intelligence but I do like their approach to media. You don't have to read my forum or blog. I'm certainly not forcing you. Now by chance if I talk bad about you on my forums, rarely will I use your name but there is always a reason on why I talk about someone good or bad. It appears lately a tired old local rock band gets offended with what I say. Apparently a handful of others do too. The solution is simple. Don't read my stuff. |O| It's that cut and dry. Some say I shouldn't post what I say online. Why? It's not any different than talking to your friends about a topic. Is it because I'm negative sometimes? I have a right to talk about my experiences when it's on my own website forum. We all talk about the good and bad in our everyday conversations. I see no difference except that typing it online, is constant where as talking about it verbally can change as the story is told to others. Some call it "embellishment". Now, I've heard that people have lost respect for me.. Ummmmm why? I've always been like this. I've always spent time typing or writing. I write all the time for enjoyment. So what respect are you talking about? Is it respect as a musician? Then why should my writings affect that. Make sense? My drumming isn't affected by my writing. Is it respect as a person? Strange, the people that were in my life are still in my life before and after I write and I've been writing on forums for over a decade. All the people close to me are still there so I really don't see a problem. Apparently, from what I understand is that there are some distant people who don't know me very well either as a musician or a person that are losing respect for me. That is very odd don't you think? Should I lose sleep over it? I can't.. because it honestly doesn't bother me. If these people have names, then speak up but if you don't have a tongue, then complaining about me is pointless. When you have respect or lose respect for someone, that's an individuals right. I can't change how someone feels about me when the fact is, my life is what it is. I've always been open with my thoughts, verbal, opinionated but also dedicated, focused and honest. So if respect is lost for me, the problem lies elsewhere because I have in fact, not changed.. Sorry to disappoint you all.. ;-)
Then you have people that hate me. Again.. so what. I won't lose sleep over it. Everyone in the world has someone that dislikes them for some reason, but we're talking hate. I've seen my name mentioned on a few forums in both good and bad
context but there have been a few that want to cause harm. Hmmmm. Now folks, is my written word influencing that kind of attitude or are the individuals who want to cause harm to me the problem. The retarded thing about all of that is that, I don't know these people. "FREE SPEECH" is what my right is. Threatening someone is not a freedom. It's a crime. The bottom line is that I am who I am. It's up to you to make your own choices to accept who I am just like I do with others. If I choose to dislike, for example, a local band for their lack of talent, fat ego attitudes or their quest for being superior beings, that is my prerogative. The truth is, I like, love and respect many individuals that have come in contact with me over the years. They may not be on your list. So be it. I also don't like certain people and you may disagree with my choices but it all comes down to the personal experiences you've had with these people and how they function with you. Going back to my earlier statements, this is was makes our lives unique. We take this journey through life and we all meet people. We even meet the same people in some cases but our experiences won't be exactly the same with these people. Make sense? If I spout off about someone or a band, it's drawn from the experience I've had with them. You may have an experience with them that's good where as mine may have been bad. If you're a dickhead band that caused some crap with me, theirs a good chance I won't say much good about you. Is it my fault? No. Actions cause a reaction. Simple physics really. |O| So any outsider that takes sides, has to understand the circumstances and not just one side of the story. Most dummies take one side and never give the second side a chance to voice their opinions. Hmmmmm sounds like the problem with fans of this local band. They like the band, I don't and they get sour because I'm verbal about it. tsk tsk. It's pointless to explain the other side in cases like this because their minds are made up so, my writings will continue to strike a nerve with them because they just can't believe me. They don't even try. |O| The written word has power though and it seems to strike nerves sometimes.. ;-)
I grow a bit tired of people trying to knock me off the pedestal of what I like to call "My Life". It just won't work with me but some seem to enjoy the challenge. There is no way I want to go through life saying that everything is good, everything is happy, all people are wonderful, all music is great.. blah blah blah. It's just not the truth. Certain musicians in this city want to be sugar coated with compliments and have their egos stroked. It's laughable. I would rather the truth but these dopes want to be lied to. I just can't stoop to lying and giving people false hope. It's just not my way. If you want my opinion, you will get the truth.
So I'm happy to say that I will say what I want, like what I want, love who I want, criticize who I want and you'll have to accept it or just don't bother with me and block me out. Do what makes you happy ;-) That's what I do. That's what most people do and the bottom line is, never read my posts again. If you follow my rants and they piss you off... then remember, no one forced you ya dummy|O|. There's a million and one things you could be doing. I'm not forcing anyone to read my stuff. If you want to read my writings and then cry and complain about it to others like you've been thoroughly belittled and wronged, that's your own fault, not mine. You did something to irk me so basically, stop being a dickhead who "starts" shit. |O| Bottom line, if you're an instigator don't read my stuff because I have a right to respond. If you don't want a response, avoid my forum |O|. What you don't know won't hurt you I believe is the old saying.
Now, in closing I want to say that I still get offers to play in bands despite what some Glen haters think. I play in 2 now and I still get offers to play in other bands. I've recorded 3 albums this year alone and presently working on a 4th with my own band. I have a solid marriage of nearly 30 years. I have lots of friends, some going back to my elementary school days. I have a great dog. I have a life of music, graphic art design and mechanics. I own my own house and I have lots of toys. I enjoy learning as much as I can about music and I want to achieve more before I'm placed in a pine box. I constantly study music to better myself. Outside of this circle of life, are people that just don't know me and probably never will. In turn, they make shit up. It doesn't affect the inner circle I have but they like to think it does. I don't get how some people can think that because I have a loud voice, it will affect my life in a negative way all the time when in fact It truly broadens it. Why can't the few naysayers grasp that little fact. Maybe the respect I've lost from certain people really wasn't there for the right reasons? Maybe it just wasn't true respect. Either way, the most important people and things in my life are ironically still there so to the ones on the outside looking in..... You've been mislead and missed the point of my rants. My life has never been better, music career has never been better and my happiness has never been higher and the icing on the cake... my forum, blogs and other websites have never been more popular |O|
I'll just never understand why certain people are intrigued by my jibberish to the extent that it pisses them off to the point they have to go around lying about me or what I do or write. You really need a hobby. Try typing like me.. haha
I LOVE typing and writing.. ;-).. oh and one more thing. Try talking and living the truth for a change.
glen "the freq".
